Mulan

So I spent my night watching cartoon movies, so what?

I'm a big kid and I admit it!

hahahahahaha!

Disney does not produce enough cartoons to quench my satisfaction for colour motioned pictures with adult jokes!

So, after like a million years, I've decided to watch Mulan again.

I remembered when I was a little girl, 12 I think, my daddy would bring me for movies, KFCs, Starbucking and such.

That's cos he loves me the most, and I was the only kid around that had time to spend with him!

Anyways, my dad used to bring me for these cartoon movies, it was so fun, just me and him, 2 cokes, popcorn.

He would teach me to pull the straw up and down the cover of the drink, to make the squeeky noise just to piss everyone off.

He's such an example to follow!

Mulan is a chinese character in ancient history, of a young girl who goes to war, impersonating a man, in place of her old aged father.

This is what I call love.

This movie pretty much reflects many things about us in life.

We're this young girl.



We're plain, we're simple, we love cheating because we know we aren't smart, we are lazy, we love lazing about in bed, and getting our dogs (people) to do our jobs for us (feeding chickens etc etc)

Along comes family pride and honour to ruin our lives.

As it is, Family pride and honour is still very much alive in this country.
We have to make ourselves presentable, to look the best, and marry the cream of the crop
(aka rich gold mine bastard)
to please our parents and to make them proud.

We lose weight (something that I have yet to succeed), we dress up, we put on 4 inches thick of make up and heels, we pretend to act dainty, we eat slowly, we talk gently.

But we all know that when no one is looking or when we're alone in our rooms,
we love to walk around with nothing but our panties on, dig our noses, flick it, scratch our bum,
then our crotch, burp, fart, sit with legs wide open, yawn as widely as possible,

that is, do everything that boys do.

We are all the same.

The reason why we don't do it in front of boys is because of years of training to mould us into the model women that the society approves of.

So that we would become marriage material.

So, Mulan dresses up, goes to the match maker, is given a cricket for good luck,

and gets her family dishonoured for not being approved of being the perfect wife.



She then loses all faith in life, and decides that the person she is trying to be is not the person who she is.

Then Christina Aguilera's song comes on screen and makes us tear as deep down,
we all know that what we show to the world,
is actually not who we are.



So she wipes off her make up in front of the ancestral plate,
feels sorry for herself,
yada yada yada.

Our make up, the front we put up when we greet the whole world,
may not be the person whom we really are.
We act the way society wants us to act, so that we get the approval of everyone.

Admit it, we aim to please.

Ok, so China gets attacked by the Huns

(wait, aren't the current Chinese people labelled as Huns in the olden days?)

or are they Genghis Khans?

That's why the Emperor built the Wall of China to keep them out, kan?

Doesn't matter, we all know theres always a bad guy in everyone's live.

Ok, so her dad gets called into the Army to fight the bad guys.

She does not allow,
Her dad scolds her,
says she's dishonoured the family for stopping him and embarrassing him in public,
makes her feel like shit,
she cries.

You get the story.

Then she decides to be the hero and cut her hair to become a boy and go to war in place of her dad.



In a way, this is an act of filial piety.
She loves her dad, and knows that her dad is too old for this shit.
So she go act hero lah.

But Mulan does not go to war alone.
(well duh, for obvious reasons)



She has the lucky cricket, her steady steed and the annoying ancestral dragon - mushu.

Those 3 are like our friends.

We have Mushu.



Ever so annoying,
so bossy,
VERY VERY sacarstic,
Sometimes have hidden agendas for their own benefits but hide them really well.

But in the end, they still care a whole deal for you.

Sometimes they create trouble for you,


but other times they feed you.
(mushu always cracks me up)

Then we have the lucky cricket



The cricket is always there by your side,
they arent lucky, but they tell you they are,
so that you have a moral boost and confidence.

Just like alot of our friends,
they arent happy little bunnies within, but still they act happy so that YOU become happy.

Thats the whole theorum of cricket friends.

Gives you moral boosts.

Then we have the steady steed.


Always there by your side,
at your beck and call,
you can always rely on them to be there for you.

Sometimes they have pride and ego,
at times they don't like your other friends.

But they still try and get along for your well being.



You may fumble through life, do all the wrong things,
make your employees doubt your capabilities,

But you know for sure, that your trustee friends will ALWAYS be by your side watching out for you.

So she saves the day (China)
(the story is too long for me to actually go into)

and the Emperor tells the General
(whom she has a huge high school crush on)
(but General is mad at her for lying about being a man)
(there is a death penalty but he doesnt kill her)
(because he is confused about his feelings - for a man? woman?)
(is the General gay if he didnt know that she was a woman?)

NEVERMIND.

The Emperor told him,

"The flower that blooms in adversity, is the rarest"

That is to say, the flowers that blooms in the harshest of conditions, will be the rarest one of all.

Unfortunate circumstances will bring out who you really are within.

If you're a good one, the whole world will know, no matter how you look like.

But if you're just rotten within,
well,

good luck man.

Not forgetting what her father told her after she has dishonoured the family during the match making



He said,
"look, the only flower that has not bloomed yet.
But when it does,
it will be the most beautiful flower of all"
(pointing at the last Cherry Blossom)

So my dear readers, be you male or female,
do not worry that you have not started advancing in life when the rest of your peers have.

Because one day, you will too :)

Remember,

No matter how shitty life gets,

You'll always have your trustee friends with you.

If you seriously, honestly, don't have any friends,

then, I'm really sorry.

You mus be one sad, little person.

X