ARghhhhhhhhh!

Argh.

The sight of it kills me.

Yes, we will be discussing about the household roach today.

Commonly known as lipas, kakchuak, xiu kiong, kaka, etc etc

Cockroach, as they call it, are the most abominable creatures of the insect world.

One sight of it sends women (and some men) screaming in all directions.

One such person is me.

I am most terrified of this gross bastard.

It's everywhere.

It watches you when you sleep,
when you shower,
when you take a dump,
when you dig your nose when you think no one is watching.

There's always someone watching you do something.

The cockroach is always watching.

Remember the times when you sleep and you feel something slight brushing you gently or tickling you slightly?

Yes, think no further, it's the work of the cockroach snuggling up to you.


they are really not as cute as the cartoons portray them

The cockroach has been year for millions of years, coming from the times of the dinosaurs.

WHY DON'T THEY JUST DIE?

Like the damn Do-do bird?

GODAMIT I HATE COCKROACHES!!
@#$@%!

Especially the winged ones.

The ones that fly.



Heck, its as if they have fear detectors.

They actually fly after you when you try running away from them!

I have once surrendered my room for a night just because a roach was in it.

Why are they even called "Cockroaches"

Do they come from Cocks?

Do Cocks produced it?

Is that why we call men "Dirty Bastards?"

WHY?

SOMEONE TELL ME.

WHY DO THEY EVEN EXIST?

There are many kinds of roaches.

Like this forest roach.

They are fine if they are not in the house.
and preferably if they did not fly.

Why can't just all roaches stay outside and stop flying around terrorising cowards like me?????

Here are some disgusting facts of our roomates:
(yes,unfortunately, we reside with roaches, no matter how clean we think our rooms are)

1. It's brain is all over the body. So if you chopped its head off, it still be able to live for a week.
It'd die not because of not having a head, but not having a head to drink.

And you thought decapitation did the trick.

2. It has 18 knees.
WTF?????

3. They can squeeze through any cracks.

Any cracks.

Even your butt cracks.

4. Female Roaches mates only once and is pregnant for the rest of their lives.
WTF????

5. It's antenna, which rival NASA’s Global Positioning System, help it locate family and friends with state-of-the-art precision.

6. Its set of eyes, made up of 4,000 individual lenses, allows it to see simultaneously in all directions.

So when you think no one is watching you pull out your wedgie, think again.

7. It does not shed its skin, but its skeleton.

8. You know that white gook that spurts out when it's stepped on or bitten into? That’s just stored fat.

They don't die.

Ever (well from crushing them).

9. In a nuclear war which would level the Earth, cockroaches would be the only survivors.

10. Cockroaches can run 3 miles an hour. So imagine them chasing you.

11. Crushed cockroaches can be applied to stinging wounds to help relieve the pain.

I don't see why Noah had to invite the Cockroach onto the Arc when God decided to drown the whole world.

He should just have left the Cockroach and the damn mosquitoe behind.

Sigh.

The happy roach sunbathing.

X