Friday, April 24, 2009

10 things to do with a fork



Oh yes, the fork. What would we do without this invention?

This has become a daily essential household item that we can't do without.
Besides using it for our food, I have discovered several other uses for this useful utensil.

1) Scratch that itch. You can estimate the amount of pressure to exert to scratch out that itch.
It's definite and its hard.
If it itches, it shall be scratched.
Same goes for balls you guys have.
Or mosquitoes bites.

2) Give it to a farm mouse to use as a rake.

3) Use it as a hair accessorie to keep your hair up. Then when you're hungry, you can take it out and eat your food, then clean it with the serviette then tie your hair back up with it.

4) Use it as a weapon or a deterrent at the dinner table to stop itchy hands from touching food they shouldn't.
Stab the hands that take things that don't belong to them.

5) Use it as a comb. Works well with tangles. Like Ariel the Mermaid.

6) Scratch it on the walls to create screechy noises to irritate the hell out of everyone.

7) Use it for fencing. Instead of fencing, it shall hence be named 'forking'. Same effect.

8) Poke your dog to make him get out of the seat you want to be in.

9) Suicide - gouging your eyes out till you bleed to death.

10) Safety weapon - poke that bastard to death when he tries to do anything funny to you.

:)

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