Thursday, January 14, 2010

Mother and Daughter Relationships

Most mothers and daughters have this special bond that ovverrides any other relationships that ever exists.

It consists of mainly "I can't live without you, but I CAN'T live WITH YOU."

There are three subsets of different kinds of mothers.

Mother No.1

The ever so caring, ever understanding, "YES" mother that wants you to be happy and will support your every step along the way without ever doubting or questioning your intelligence on being able to handle stuff on your own.

They will never force their views on you, merely giving motherly advise and in hope that you'll take heed.

However, these subset of mothers strongly believe that their daughters/children should take their own leap of faith and see what turns out.

Mothers like these rarely have any strains with their daughters and they are hardly ever at each other necks.

Mother No.2

Extremely loving mother who has a streak of crazy over-protectiveness, most probably because she just loves her children TOO MUCH and they are the centre of their world. These mothers would give ANYTHING to their children in hope that these children become her minions and do her every bidding.

These mothers are controlling and always think they are right and want the best for their daughters. Nothing the daughters do will ever be right, and these mothers never seem to be contented with their children. These mothers want the best for their children and would never take no for an answer. They will never stop even if an earthquake hits them. They have to give an opinion on everything, never seem to stop talking and making sure people accepts their decisions.

Mothers like these have a partial loving yet strained relationships with their daughters. They are always at each others' necks but gets back together sooner or later because they can't deny their love for each other.

Mother No.3

These subset of mothers are those who don't give a shit about their daughters. They are either too into their own self (ie botox, gambling, drinking, toyboys) or that they pay too much attention to their sons, because they're traditional like that.

These mothers often think that their daughters are a liability and would pray that their daughters get married quickly.

They don't pay attention to them, even when the daughters ask for it. They often show a cold shoulder towards them. Most likely because ...... there are no reasons why mothers can ever show a cold shoulder to their own offsprings. But there are people like that.

Relationships between these mother and daughters are - non existent. Mother ignores daughter, daughter ignores mother (but hides feeling inside to want affection from them), life moves on, daughter has another daughter and hopefully treats her differently from how her mother treated her.


Of course with different kinds of mothers there will be also different kinds of daughters lah.

Daughter No.1

Mummy's little girl. Everything she'll listen to mummy. She'll listen to what mummy says, what she should wear where she should go what she should do who she should date who she should marry bla bla bla. You get the idea. They look like a carbon copy of each other.

Mothers absolutely love these kind of daughters. Very suitable for controlling mothers.

Daughter No. 2

Love their mothers to bits, but has reservation of their own thoughts. They don't want to hurt their mother with their thinking but wants to stand firm on their decisions. They are very considerate of their mothers' feelings however they don't want to suffer their whole lives with a decision made by someone else. Would do absolutely anything for their mothers however will always take time to make sure that their own interests are protected.

Controlling mothers have a love-hate relationship with these kind of daughters.

Daughter No.3

Daughters like these are indifferent to what their mothers say. They are in their own world, only listens to their own decisions, doesn't give a shit about what anyone says.

Very hardheaded, very stubborn, very blunt. They walk in and out of the house without recognition of their mothers.

Most likely hurt badly when young by mother or any other influential figure, hence developing this hard armour to protect her self interests further. Mothers' like these have a tough time cracking these kind of nut.



Apologies for being brief, but I was only touching on the end of the sticks and the middle. There are much room for the grey area of mother daughter relationships which would take an extreme amount of time to venture into.

Basically, mum is no.2 and I'm also no.2.

We have a terrible love hate relationship. I don't know what she feels like doing to me, but most of the time, I feel like putting a pillow over head and suffocating her to death, or sewing up her mouth, or praying to God that she loses her voice - forever. But you know, these rarely comes true. She really knows how to push my buttons and I know how to push hers as well. Most days we're really good. But on the bad days, we're worse. We're like cats and dogs. We hate each other to the core, but we eventually we love each other back. It's a really complicated relationship we have. I suppose its the immense love that we have for each other that makes us so different but we don't want to see each other fall. But it works out in the end (because I tend to step back to prevent her getting heart attack or stroke). I will KIV till when these arrangement works out for the both of us.

Sigh. The things I do not to kill my mum! >_<

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