There are some things that I’ve noticed about china construction workers that work in Singapore during my short stay here. I find it most compelling to spread the word to the world on my observations about these china men.
1) They have no sense of oral hygiene.
They are practically dirtier than my door mat. They also have the worst case of gingivitis. When they speak they actually kill me. They’re pay isn’t that low, I’m sure they can spend a few bucks on Listerine. But no, they always decide to save that money and visit Geylang then contract some funky disease which makes them deaf or have their penises drop off then they come find us and try to sue their employers for industrial accidents. WTF?
2) They don’t know any housekeeping tips.
They also don’t realize that they shouldn’t keep their clothes in a confined space when it isn’t dry.
This causes their clothes to reek of the disgusting SMELL that I’m not even going to go into. They are just so freaking smelly. I mean, ok, you can’t afford really nice smelling detergents, but at least your clothes wont stink when you completely air them out to dry! WTF man.
3) They are not a fan of showers.
Their freaking BOs are just too much to take. I mean a little sweat on a man is bearable. But this is just OTT. Wtf man. I feel like gagging every time they come and speak. They’ve never met showers, no? Or is it that China doesn’t approve of showering? I really don’t understand? It’s like they haven showered for a week and decide to surprise us and overpower us with their manly scent. PFT.
4) We ask for news, they give us the weather.
When they speak, they like to shower us with spittle of saliva. That is the grossest you can ever get. I practically sanitise and sterilize everything and every place they touch when they come to my desk. Some of their spittle range from the size of a full stop to a full blown mole on a person’s face. They best part is that they don’t realize that.
5) They have the worst fashion sense – EVER.
They tend to pair high school socks with loafers and ¾ pants with polo shirts. And some fake shit Emporio Armani sunglasses. With their crew cuts. Who the fuck wears socks with loafers? And with ¾ pants? And still has crew cuts? (maybe my brother still does ok, at least he’s is decent).
6) They seem to speak like amplifiers.
They are LOUD. One word. LOUD. They are so loud, its embarrassing. They are like a gaggle of geese together. Or a flock of chickens. Or gang of banshees. I don’t know how to describe it. It’s like they are trying to outdo each other by speaking louder than one another. Especially on the telephone. They are practically screaming into it! We’re not using paper cups and strings for communication like the olden times you know? Moderate tones are acceptable, thank you very much.
7) They don’t ever listen.
They ask you one question over and over again for like 5 times, hoping for a different answer. Or either that, they don’t register it in their thick skulls when we tell them important things. We tell them to read. Then after reading, they can still ask us the same questions which are answered in the reading material. Wtf man? Does China not teach comprehensive studies? WTF!@#!)@(!)!(@)!(@)$!((!!@!@$*@#(%*@(^*
And they love coming here several times asking you the same questions. Sometimes they pounce on different people to ask the same questions. They’re just wasting our time. When we tell them something, they don’t believe us. Why the fuck are you seeking our help when you don’t even believe what we say? WTF man.
When we tell them to listen to us while we speak and give advice, they don’t. It’s like they’re trying to do all the talking. How the hell are we going to help you when you don’t give us a chance to speak?
8) They love hanging around
- by squatting (in little groups). In little corners of the place. Or outside your door. THIS IS NOT CHINA. IF YOU WANNA SQUAT YOU CAN GO BACK TO YOUR ROOMS/HOMES/COUNTRY AND SQUAT ALL YOU WANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Squatting is not at all pleasing to the eyes. It’s not at all civilized to be squatting around. Neither is sitting cross legged outside our doors. There are chairs. Please use them.
9) They think we’re Gods.
And that we can do anything and everything. Truth is, we can only do the law bit. The rest is your call. We can’t do everything for you. We’re not your mum OK!
10) They have very little common sense.
Except when applying it to their jobs. That, they know a lot of things. But common sense of life, simple things like never believe what people tell you, they fail big time. They are practically big kids that believe everyone. That’s why they get tricked. ARGH. And I doubt educations got anything to do with common sense. Man, I’ve studied so much, I still have NO sense at all.
Am I just being mean? I’m a terrible person aren’t I? But these construction workers really give me bad migraines with the BO. Really man. WTF.
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