There's several things that lots of ladies out there failed to realise. I'm here to break it gently to you :
a) Don't act so haolian when you're carrying your LV, Gucci, Ted Baker etc etc etc. No one cares if you're carrying a branded bag and they might even suspect you buying contrabands so if you're humble and carrying a branded bag you open yourself up for less or no criticisms. You can buy that bag, others also can buy ok. NO BIG DEAL. Later your bag kena snatch and before that you act so haolian parading around, people will only laugh at you and say, PADAN MUKA. who ask you to show off your bag in public? Don't say I didn't tell you so.
b) You're not as fat as you think. If you're size 16 and above and you complain that you're fat, ok, I give it to you, you can berate about your life till the cows come home. But if you're size 10 and below and you complain that you're fat and so uber depressed about it, I WILL SIT ON YOU. That is not even a baseless scare. That is a formal warning. I hate seeing skinny girls complaining about their flat tummys and pulling at their skins on their arms and thighs, SKIN I TELL YOU. Theres not even fats that they're pulling. WTF man, are you just dumb or are you just blatantly rubbing your flat tummies and skinny arms in my face????? Lao niang will suffocate you with my big ass.
c) Not all men can provide you with money, loyalty, look like Jerry Yan and a home. They can only provide you with 1 out of 4. or 2 out of 4 if you're really lucky. The perfect man that you're waiting for does not exist. And if he DOES exist, do you think he'll be with you? Do you actually think that he'll actually notice you? Have you even looked yourself in the mirror? Do you look anything like Cheryl Cole? If no, please do not expect men that ticks all your categories to look at you. Even if he looks at you and picks you, don't expect him to keep all his sexiness and handsomeness to himself!
d) If you haven looked yourself in the mirror and evaluated your self worth, don't go berating men who rejected you. Have you even tried tweezing your bush of an eyebrow or wearing a skirt? You fantasise about men you watch in korean and japanese dramas and you come back to reality and expect the same out of our own slobbery men. HOW CAN? They never expected you to pop right out of the playboy magazine, I feel that you shouldn't expect them to do things that you want them to.
Example. You want a man whose like those of the fairytale love stories in korean dramas. They want you to only be in the kitchen all day, and when they come home they expect you to be naked lying on the bed with double Ds and still be able to put a feast on the table. Are both parties able to live up to the expectations? I didnt think so!
e) Don't expect people to pull doors open for you, allow you to cut queue etc when you don't look like Katy Perry. The world is this superficial. Stop whining that just because you're a woman men should automatically kowtow to you. You should know by now that there are more assholes then gentlemen. And men love pretty things. So when you realise you need to flirt and be pretty to get your way in life, the whinings will automatically decrease.
f) If you're fat, or have fats in places that are OTT, please don't wear things that make them bulge out even worse. And also please don't wear gunny sacks. You know those big bags of clothes that makes you look like a sack of shapeless potatoes? If you're unhappy with your shape, get a corset or seomthing that squeezes the unnatural fat dispositions into a shape! You have to realise that there are many women out to sabotage you and by that when they say you look great even though you feel like you look like shit, they are actually hoping you look like crap so other men look at them instead of you. Trust your gut instinct. This however, also only applies to women who have the correct gut instinct. Not all fashion is wearable. Just because they were on the walkways, doesn't mean its pleasing to the eyes. Just, just don't wear something that doesn't compliment you. I may not be a fashionista, and by God I've committed some of the most terrible fashion crimes on earth, but now at least I know what to stay away from! Lol
g) Buying all those fat-free products doesn't make you any slimmer. It's tricking yourself to thinking that you're eating all those fat-free things. And lets face it, most companies put the word fat-free there to lure idiots to buy them. They are equally loaded with the same amount of sugar or fat, or even worse, other chemicals and trans-blabla that make you think its the same as the normal things you eat. Thats by far worse than ingesting fats into your body. Thats how people get so much cancer and such. PLUS they charge you more for fat-free stuff. I'm just thinking you're just paying extra for poison that you're eating. Might as well cook it yourself or make it yourself! Much healthier.
h) Please don't whine to your friends when you're secretly happy about your life and want to rub it in their faces. It's actually very obvious what you're trying to do and it makes them feel worse. Just be happy about your life and they'll feel happy for you. Unless that thing you're whining about really is morally wrong, then please don't. Happy things should be kept happy. Don't try to sour-coat it. If they really are your friends, you'll naturally know that they feel happy for you..
i) I once saw a girl who tried to make her eyes look bigger by enlarging her eyes all the time before taking pictures. Now she looks like a mortified/petrified character out of Tim Burton's scary ass cartoon movies. It's that ugly. I believe that if she had relaxed her eye muscles she would have looked so much prettier. Shes really the butt of all my ugly jokes now. I don't understand why you have to FORCE yourself to be beautiful. In a way you already are. If you're that unhappy (like me), just put la eye shadow, mascara, fake eye lashes and all. Don't have to stretch your muscles so far kan? It must be damn tiring to be her lor. Sad.
j) If you think your ass looks big in that skirt or jeans, it probably is. Don't need to ask others for 2nd opinions that you want to hear. And don't bully your poor bf into telling you things that you want to hear and then fucking him up for lying in your face. WTF do you want man!?!?!?!??!?!?!!??!?!!?
k) Please learn how to cook. It's very useful for you : self independence, pleasing your in laws, husband/bf, and children. Its only a baser instinct for being a mother. Even men are better at cooking. Shame on you! Its like how you expect men to know how to fix a light bulb!
l) Stop glaring at other women who are obviously prettier than you, and also stop laughing at women who are inferior to you. It sickens me to know that there are several of you out there that are like this. Each to its own. I'm sure you have something to hide and that you've hidden it well, not everyone knows your flaws. You're not perfect. Don't judge others by their looks unless you want the same done to you.
m) Concealer is good for you if you have blemished skin. If you're going to be out in public where 90% of the population is going to staring at your scary ass acned skin, please, for the love of humanity, put on some make up. Seriously no man wants women with terribly acned skin. When I was younger I had such bad acne, I had no bfs. And when I learnt how to cover them up, men slowly started coming into my life. True story. Men are superficial assholes.
n) Don't be too churchy/holy. I know that only a certain group of men (aka church go-ers) would approve of this attitude. It's good to have God in your life and praise his ways, but to overdo it is another matter. Then instead of the pious girl that you want to be, you'll fondly be remembered as the crazy church virgin who can't get married because she drowns men in bible verses. No joke. If you're old and still want to reproduce, and men in church obviously aren't going to marry you for reasons best known to themselves, keep the prayers and bible teachings and all the praise the lord antics to yourself (ie confinements of your room when you're alone). Remember, God helps those who helps themselves. He will always know if you're faithful to him. He doesn't have to hear you speak the words of the Bible to everyone you see. Just act normal. Nothing out of the norm, and you'll be fine....
o) If you have too many cats, hamsters, posters of anime, posters of boy bands, prepare yourself for spinsterhood.
p) men love women who are obedient, cook, wash, iron their clothes and serve them in bed. Anything other than that is unnecessary - especially in our traditional asian culture. If you're thinking of marrying a Malaysian man, mostly likely you'd have to stick to my 5 golden rules as aforementioned, and you're set for life - no matter how you look like. Men want to come home to good cooked food, clean floors and toilets, clean crisp shirts and plenty of sex. They do not want to : a) see papers and files lying around b) hear about your boringly painful day at work and about the gossips flying around your office c) have to do the house chores together with you (that is YOUR DUTY). d) have to run out again to buy dinner e) beg you for sex and then get rejected and then have to 'tam' you back because you get angry at him for asking for sex.
q) If the size doesn't fit, don't buy it. don't buy things that you hope you'll slim down to fit into. Same goes for shoes. If it doesn't fit, it never will.
r) excessive petty tantrums does not get you far in life. Blackmail does.
a) Don't act so haolian when you're carrying your LV, Gucci, Ted Baker etc etc etc. No one cares if you're carrying a branded bag and they might even suspect you buying contrabands so if you're humble and carrying a branded bag you open yourself up for less or no criticisms. You can buy that bag, others also can buy ok. NO BIG DEAL. Later your bag kena snatch and before that you act so haolian parading around, people will only laugh at you and say, PADAN MUKA. who ask you to show off your bag in public? Don't say I didn't tell you so.
b) You're not as fat as you think. If you're size 16 and above and you complain that you're fat, ok, I give it to you, you can berate about your life till the cows come home. But if you're size 10 and below and you complain that you're fat and so uber depressed about it, I WILL SIT ON YOU. That is not even a baseless scare. That is a formal warning. I hate seeing skinny girls complaining about their flat tummys and pulling at their skins on their arms and thighs, SKIN I TELL YOU. Theres not even fats that they're pulling. WTF man, are you just dumb or are you just blatantly rubbing your flat tummies and skinny arms in my face????? Lao niang will suffocate you with my big ass.
c) Not all men can provide you with money, loyalty, look like Jerry Yan and a home. They can only provide you with 1 out of 4. or 2 out of 4 if you're really lucky. The perfect man that you're waiting for does not exist. And if he DOES exist, do you think he'll be with you? Do you actually think that he'll actually notice you? Have you even looked yourself in the mirror? Do you look anything like Cheryl Cole? If no, please do not expect men that ticks all your categories to look at you. Even if he looks at you and picks you, don't expect him to keep all his sexiness and handsomeness to himself!
d) If you haven looked yourself in the mirror and evaluated your self worth, don't go berating men who rejected you. Have you even tried tweezing your bush of an eyebrow or wearing a skirt? You fantasise about men you watch in korean and japanese dramas and you come back to reality and expect the same out of our own slobbery men. HOW CAN? They never expected you to pop right out of the playboy magazine, I feel that you shouldn't expect them to do things that you want them to.
Example. You want a man whose like those of the fairytale love stories in korean dramas. They want you to only be in the kitchen all day, and when they come home they expect you to be naked lying on the bed with double Ds and still be able to put a feast on the table. Are both parties able to live up to the expectations? I didnt think so!
e) Don't expect people to pull doors open for you, allow you to cut queue etc when you don't look like Katy Perry. The world is this superficial. Stop whining that just because you're a woman men should automatically kowtow to you. You should know by now that there are more assholes then gentlemen. And men love pretty things. So when you realise you need to flirt and be pretty to get your way in life, the whinings will automatically decrease.
f) If you're fat, or have fats in places that are OTT, please don't wear things that make them bulge out even worse. And also please don't wear gunny sacks. You know those big bags of clothes that makes you look like a sack of shapeless potatoes? If you're unhappy with your shape, get a corset or seomthing that squeezes the unnatural fat dispositions into a shape! You have to realise that there are many women out to sabotage you and by that when they say you look great even though you feel like you look like shit, they are actually hoping you look like crap so other men look at them instead of you. Trust your gut instinct. This however, also only applies to women who have the correct gut instinct. Not all fashion is wearable. Just because they were on the walkways, doesn't mean its pleasing to the eyes. Just, just don't wear something that doesn't compliment you. I may not be a fashionista, and by God I've committed some of the most terrible fashion crimes on earth, but now at least I know what to stay away from! Lol
g) Buying all those fat-free products doesn't make you any slimmer. It's tricking yourself to thinking that you're eating all those fat-free things. And lets face it, most companies put the word fat-free there to lure idiots to buy them. They are equally loaded with the same amount of sugar or fat, or even worse, other chemicals and trans-blabla that make you think its the same as the normal things you eat. Thats by far worse than ingesting fats into your body. Thats how people get so much cancer and such. PLUS they charge you more for fat-free stuff. I'm just thinking you're just paying extra for poison that you're eating. Might as well cook it yourself or make it yourself! Much healthier.
h) Please don't whine to your friends when you're secretly happy about your life and want to rub it in their faces. It's actually very obvious what you're trying to do and it makes them feel worse. Just be happy about your life and they'll feel happy for you. Unless that thing you're whining about really is morally wrong, then please don't. Happy things should be kept happy. Don't try to sour-coat it. If they really are your friends, you'll naturally know that they feel happy for you..
i) I once saw a girl who tried to make her eyes look bigger by enlarging her eyes all the time before taking pictures. Now she looks like a mortified/petrified character out of Tim Burton's scary ass cartoon movies. It's that ugly. I believe that if she had relaxed her eye muscles she would have looked so much prettier. Shes really the butt of all my ugly jokes now. I don't understand why you have to FORCE yourself to be beautiful. In a way you already are. If you're that unhappy (like me), just put la eye shadow, mascara, fake eye lashes and all. Don't have to stretch your muscles so far kan? It must be damn tiring to be her lor. Sad.
j) If you think your ass looks big in that skirt or jeans, it probably is. Don't need to ask others for 2nd opinions that you want to hear. And don't bully your poor bf into telling you things that you want to hear and then fucking him up for lying in your face. WTF do you want man!?!?!?!??!?!?!!??!?!!?
k) Please learn how to cook. It's very useful for you : self independence, pleasing your in laws, husband/bf, and children. Its only a baser instinct for being a mother. Even men are better at cooking. Shame on you! Its like how you expect men to know how to fix a light bulb!
l) Stop glaring at other women who are obviously prettier than you, and also stop laughing at women who are inferior to you. It sickens me to know that there are several of you out there that are like this. Each to its own. I'm sure you have something to hide and that you've hidden it well, not everyone knows your flaws. You're not perfect. Don't judge others by their looks unless you want the same done to you.
m) Concealer is good for you if you have blemished skin. If you're going to be out in public where 90% of the population is going to staring at your scary ass acned skin, please, for the love of humanity, put on some make up. Seriously no man wants women with terribly acned skin. When I was younger I had such bad acne, I had no bfs. And when I learnt how to cover them up, men slowly started coming into my life. True story. Men are superficial assholes.
n) Don't be too churchy/holy. I know that only a certain group of men (aka church go-ers) would approve of this attitude. It's good to have God in your life and praise his ways, but to overdo it is another matter. Then instead of the pious girl that you want to be, you'll fondly be remembered as the crazy church virgin who can't get married because she drowns men in bible verses. No joke. If you're old and still want to reproduce, and men in church obviously aren't going to marry you for reasons best known to themselves, keep the prayers and bible teachings and all the praise the lord antics to yourself (ie confinements of your room when you're alone). Remember, God helps those who helps themselves. He will always know if you're faithful to him. He doesn't have to hear you speak the words of the Bible to everyone you see. Just act normal. Nothing out of the norm, and you'll be fine....
o) If you have too many cats, hamsters, posters of anime, posters of boy bands, prepare yourself for spinsterhood.
p) men love women who are obedient, cook, wash, iron their clothes and serve them in bed. Anything other than that is unnecessary - especially in our traditional asian culture. If you're thinking of marrying a Malaysian man, mostly likely you'd have to stick to my 5 golden rules as aforementioned, and you're set for life - no matter how you look like. Men want to come home to good cooked food, clean floors and toilets, clean crisp shirts and plenty of sex. They do not want to : a) see papers and files lying around b) hear about your boringly painful day at work and about the gossips flying around your office c) have to do the house chores together with you (that is YOUR DUTY). d) have to run out again to buy dinner e) beg you for sex and then get rejected and then have to 'tam' you back because you get angry at him for asking for sex.
q) If the size doesn't fit, don't buy it. don't buy things that you hope you'll slim down to fit into. Same goes for shoes. If it doesn't fit, it never will.
r) excessive petty tantrums does not get you far in life. Blackmail does.
1 comment:
There's SHOCKING news in the sports betting industry.
It has been said that every bettor needs to see this,
Watch this or stop placing bets on sports...
Sports Cash System - Advanced Sports Betting Software.
Post a Comment