Toxic Men

Men who are freeloaders.

We all have encountered these kind of men, whether by relationships, friendships, or by blood. They live off you. They conveniently keep quiet or mention that they forgot to bring their wallets when the bill arrives. They quietly tuck their grocery shopping into your cart and promise to pay you back later but never do. They hang around your house for dinner and leave as soon as they are full. They put on that pity face whenever they need money, but put on an act to refuse it , only to accept it in the manner that they were forced to accept the money.

Women can be leeches. Men cannot. Men are supposed to be the backbone of every relationship. The caveman theory. They bring back the bread, we home-make. We shouldn't fork out a single cent for them unless and only unless in cases of emergencies where our men genuinely needs the money. If you think they'll improve after you've gotten married, chances are, they won't. And you probably need to pay for your own wedding too.

Men who are male chauvinistic pigs (MCPs)

Men who have egos greater than Manhattan. They never lose a fight to a woman (or to a man), and are always right. They don't let their women speak and try to suppress their partner's intellect by appearing to be the alpha one between the both of them. They belittle their partners whenever they are in a group. These men have no sense of right or wrong, except that they're always right and their opinions are the ones that matter the most. Most likely they'll attract women who are compatible so as to put up with their bullshit. If you're not happy in that relationship, it's time to bail. They won't have the time to pull their heads of out their asses to listen to you.

Men who are cheaters.

This is of course rhetorical. You don't need a straight A's student to tell you to leave a man who cheats. Once a cheater, always a cheater.

Men who are competitive.

Men who loves to compete everything - salary, cars, friends, social life, clothes, everthing - with you. He laughs in your face when he wins, and scowls like a bitch when he loses. Its obvious he can't stand to lose, and would never, ever, give you, his previous girlfriend a chance not to be put down. Men like these are assholes and only deserves lovely girls who have no ego, no dignity, no passion in life, no fuss, no must. Grirls who have better sense would have kneed him in the nuts early in the relationship and left him unable to reproduce another bastard or bitch like he is.

Men who are metrosexual.

If he's getting prettier than you and is commenting on what facial wash you should use or how the polka dots are making your hips wider than his mums, its time to hit the road, Jack.

Men who have no drive in life.

If he's waiting for you to do everything (and i mean everything a guy should be in charge off) including signing him up for the life insurance, I think it's better for you to kill him off and have that policy compensation come to you. Rids the world of a scumbag and you get to earn some money.

Men who are mummy's boy's.

Unless you're in the good books of his mum, be assured that you'll have hell of a time when she's still around. And mean mummies usually live like, extra long. GOOD LUCK!

Men who talks but has no action.

You know lah, he tells you everything you want to hear. Give you disneyland fairytale story. After 2 years he's still that couch potato you wanted to bake. I know women love hearing stuff. Listening to false hopes is like aural orgasm. But you got to wake up and smell reality. If he didn't get around doing it after a year, he probably won't ever do it.

Men who are wife-beaters, or love screaming at you.

Babe, you deserve respect. Even your father doesnt lay a hand on you or raise his voice that loudly. If he's constantly raising his voice and not yet doing anything physical, well, he's only one vase away from you. Then it'll be the chair. Then it'll be his fists. Whichever arrives first. That guy will beat the shit out of you. And that one day you realise that, will be that one day you're never waking up again from that blow to the head.

Men who are haunted by past loves.

He's always mentioning about her, what she likes, what she does, etc. And from his voice, you can still sense that he longs for her and the break up wasn't his idea. You'll never reach that benchmark no matter how you try. He'll always be hung up on her, and when he's banging you, he's thinking of how her vagina feels more homey than yours. Get out and let him die alone before he kills your soul bit by bit.

Men who are too good to be true.

Way out of your league? Feels like a fairytale story? Feels like you're floating? Too good to be true? It probably is. Time for a reality check, and probably a profile search.


Men who rather you service him than him service you.

selfish. selfish. selfish. selfish. If he's not generous in bed, he's stingy everywhere else.

Men who cramp your style.

Seriously, you got it going and if he's cramping it, what good is he?


Men who are obsessive and possessive.

If he's either one, he's still bearable. But if he's both, its really bad. And as girls, you know how terrible you can get when you're like that. You'll know when he's crossed the line and borderline stalking and harassing you.

Men who are mini Hitlers.

They dictate, dictate and dictate. Short of a tyrant and are extremely controlling. Must wear this, cannot carry that. Eat this, never drink that. Similanjiao lah you damn tuah kee isit can control people like that?!? Limbeh's parents also never control me you want to control me? Fry kite lar you!

You get the idea?


Men who want you to role play.

Once a while and in the bedroom is fun and experimental. But if on a daily basis, and you're starting to look like Ayumi Hamasaki, I think you have a problem. They should love you as who you are (despite all your love handles, flabby arms and saggy tits chin). They shouldn't be asking you to slowly mould yourself into someone they fantasize.


Men who worship the technology more than they worship you.

If they love their technology so much, they're probably gonna love the virtual porn more than you. If they're sitting on the chair and eyes peeled to the screen monitor till theres literally a bonding device connecting the retinas to the monitor, it's best if he married the CPU. You don't want to break his true love up right? And if you're standing naked in front of him and he does not give you a second look (even though you have a bad body shape, men look anyway and oogle), its time to give reboot him.


Men with no manners.

How he treats other people will mirror how he'll treat you. If he's screaming at the waitress on the first date, he's probably gonna scream at you too at the end of the night when you slammed his precious car door a tad too hard.


Men who hate animals

have no souls.


Men who do not want to reproduce, or want any commitment of any kind.

No matter how hot they are, how big their dicks are, how fat their wallets are, leave them. Don't go down that road unless you want the same thing he does. Leave at the first chance you spot the warning signs. Do not hesitate and wait for them to change, because, they won't. They'll only waste your time and let's face it, you're not getting any younger.

Click to enlarge ok!

Hahhahahahaha.

Some fun facts!

Monstrous Beasts: 14 Bizarre Dinosaurs and Extinct Species

Thankfully, evolution has most recently tended to reward creatures for strong thinking abilities, as it’s allowed us to rise to the top of the food chain. If we’d been alive in earlier eras, however, we may not have been so lucky. Different times called for different attributes, and there was a time when size and ferocity were a species‘ most important quality. Here’s an exploration of 14 of the largest, strongest, and in some cases, strangest, creatures that have called our planet home:

(Images via sumner, copyrighted, tenth medieval, wapedia)

The Moa were flightless birds that resided in New Zealand as recently as 1500 AD. Hunted to extinction by Maori tribesmen, this bird’s dominant physical presence wasn’t enough to fight off sharpened spears. At 12 feet in height and over 500 pounds in mass, the Moa make the modern Ostritch seem diminutive.

(Images via sedgwick museum, moblog , ny times, plesiosaur)

Pliosaurs haunted the world’s oceans, attacking with intense power and speed. With short necks and huge jaws, they were killing machines. The largest Pliosaur skeleton was an incredible 52 feet long, with its head making up almost 8 feet of its total length.

(Images via sasquatchers, free republic, unexplained mysteries, crypto mundo, API)

A possible inspiration for King Kong, Gigantopithecus’ appearance resembled modern day apes, only it was much, much larger. The heftiest ape in history, they could top out at nearly 10 feet and weigh over 1,000 pounds. Gigantophithecus was a distant relative of the modern Orangutan, so most artistic depictions take this into account.

(Images via national geographic, WSU, scifi meshes)

Whorl Sharks were similar to their modern cousins despite jetting along almost 300 million years ago. While modern sharks have rows of serrated teeth ready to replace any that fall out, the whorl shark has an interesting lower jaw that looked like a circular saw, where newer teeth would push older teeth further along the line. There’s some debate about the placement of the tooth structure, but regardless of its location in the mouth or deeper in the throat, it had a startlingly unique appearance.

(Images via fmnh, fogato)

Gastornis, formerly known as Diatryma, is another horrifically large flightless bird. The most terrifying aspect of this animal is the fact that its beak implies it was carnivorous.

(Images via uta, atw, deep sea news, dinosaur pictures, hmnh, dinocasts)

Unlike sharks, that have survived for over 400 million years, Dunkleosteus had a short run of 50 million years. They would get up to 30 feet in length and weigh over 4 tons. They were the last of their kind, as we’ve been unable to find any closely related descendants.

(Images via aljazeera)

Little needs to be said about Titanoboa beyond this: 50 feet long and over 2,500 pounds. Like a titanic exaggeration of the modern boa, be thankful this snake went extinct nearly 58 million years ago.

(Images via yale, avph, charlie’s playhouse)

Arthropleura armata was the worst nightmare of any homeowner: an 8 and a half foot long bug. Similar in appearance to the modern centipede, it was one of the first invertebrates on land, and as such, most likely had little to no predators. Thankfully, they lived well over 300 million years ago, and won’t show up in your hallway any time soon.

Even the smallest creatures deserve mention, and the horned gopher (Ceratogaulus Rhinoceros) is no exception. As the smallest mammal to ever have horns, they should have at least a little recognition. It was originally thought the horns were meant for digging, but the consensus now seems to be that they were used for defense.

(Images via sitioco, cope podo, cool fun blog, mediterraneo diving, naturalist)

Jaekelopterus Rhenaniae is similar to Arthropleuria, only it lived in the ocean. At over 8 feet in length, this “sea scropion” (only in appearance) makes the largest lobsters seem like toys. It crawled along the ocean floors nearly 390 million years ago.

(Images via encyclo123, wikipedia, exhibitsrex, zimbio)

Mamenchisaurus looks much like another famous dinosuar, Brontosaurus, and is similar except for one odd difference: neck length. Their necks were up to 46 feet in length and made up 50% of their full body length. They lived nearly 150 million years ago and were entirely herbivorous.

(Images via times online, nature)

What’s more fun than a kangaroo? A 10 foot tall, 500 pound kangaroo. Procoptodon Goliah was a marsupial just like its modern cousins, and had similar features, but with a shorter face and slightly different feet. They were alive as recently as 18,000 years ago and their demise is attributed to human activity.

(Images via abc, avph, absolute astronomy, darwin online)

Macrauchenia lived around 20,000 years ago and were first discovered by Charles Darwin on his famous voyage on the Beagle. These creatures seem like a grab bag of different animals, with a small trunk and a body reminiscent of a camel. Too large to be fast enough, and too small to frighten off potential predators, they never had much of a chance.

(Images via ucmp, blogol, wikimedia)

Chalicotherium was a giant beast that walked on its back feet and knuckles, and used its long arms to pull down high branches for feeding. They were most likely slow and spent a majority of their time consuming leaves. Their only protection was their size and heavy claws on their forelegs, both of which would deter modern predators, but were unexceptional at the time.

Jo's top 100 songs of her lifetime

.............which is probably a useless piece of information to you. Not that you give a shit, but, whatever!

1. O - Town - All or nothing
   
2. Kelly Clarkson - Already Gone
3. David Cook - Always be my baby
4. Damien Rice - Amie
5. All 4 one, Jim Brickman - Beautiful as you
6. Freddie Fender - Before the next teardrop falls
7. Boyzone - Better
8. Jack Johnson - Better together
9. Damien Rice - Blower's Daughter
10. Renee Olstead - Breaking up is hard to do
11. Sade - By your side
12. Carpenters -Can't smile without you
13. Adele - Chasing Pavements
14. Katie Melua - closest thing to crazy
15. Jack Johnson - Cocoon
16. John Mayor - Comfortable
17. Oldies - Don't Cry joni
18. Gabrielle - Don't need the sun to shine
19. Bahz Lurhmann - Everybody's free (to wear sun screen)
20. Iron & Wine - Flightless bird, american mouth
21. Perry Como - For the good times
22. Britney Spears (I know, I know ) - From the bottom of my broken heart
23. Santana & Michelle Branch - The Game of Love
24. Jim Brickman - The Gift
25. Michelle Branch - Goodbye to you
26. 98 Degrees - The hardest thing
27. Brandy - Have you ever
28. Perry Como - Hawaiian wedding song
29. City & Colour - Hello, I'm in Delaware
30. Plus one - Here in my heart
31. Evermore - Hey boys and girls
32. Michael Buble - Home
33. Michael Buble - Put your head on my shoulder
34. Michael Buble - You don't know me
35. Michael Bolton - How am I supposed to live to without you
36. Joy Enriquez - How can I not love you
37. Bee Gees - How can you mend a broken heart
38. Rod Stewart - I don't wanna talk about it
39. Edwin Mccain - I'll be
40. Bonnie Raitt - I can't make you love me
41. Edwin Mccain - I could not ask for more
42. Bruce Springsteen - Secret Garden
43. Aerosmith - I don't wanna miss a thing
44. Antony and the Johnsons - I fell in love with a dead boy
45. Barbara Streisand - I finally found someone
46. Olivia Newton John - I honestly love you
47. Beth - I love how you love me
48. Jheena Lodwick - If you love me
    
49. Mouth & Mcneal - I Love you this much
50. Bee Gees - I started a joke
51. Carpenters - I won't last a day without you
52. Trisha Yearwood - I would have loved you anyway
53. Plus one - Last flight out
54. Pearl Jam - Last kiss
55. The Cranberries - Linger
56. Colbie Caillat - Magic
57. Colbie Caillat - Realize
58. The Script -The Man who can't be moved
59. Los Lonely Boys - More than love
60. S club 7 - Never had a dream come true
61. Journey South - Nobody Knows
62. Azure Ray -November
63. The Decemberists - Oceanside
64. The Decemberists- we go down together
65. Trademark - only love
66. Sheena Easton - over you
67. Pink - So what
68. Nelly furtado - Promiscuous
69. Michael Buble - Quando, Quando, Quando
70. Regina Spektor - Samson
71. Van Morrison - Searching for someone exactly like you
72. Elvis Costello - She
73. Shania Twain - You got a way
74. Santana - smooth
75. Renee Olstead - someone to watch over you
76. One Republik - Stop & Stare
77. Joshua Radin - Sundrenched world
78. Shontelle - Tshirt
79. Rihanna - Take a bow
80. Katy Perry - Thinking of you
81. N'Sync - This I promise you
82. Alex E - Tonight
83. Ryan Cabrerra - True
84. Boys like girls - two is better than one
85. Shakira - Underneath your clothes
86. Kate Winslet - What if
87. Jonas Brothers - When you look me in the eyes
88. The Shirelles - Will you still love me tomorrow
89. Bonnie Sommerville - Winding road
90. Chris Brown - with you
91. Eric Clapton - Wonderful tonight
92. James Blunt - you're beautiful
93. Lifehouse - you and me
94. Dixie Chicks - You were mine
95. Air supply - you are the reason
96. Bay City Rollers - The way I feel tonight
97. Jim Brickman - Valentine
98. Matt Monroe - Walk away
99. O-Town - Painter
100. Hinder - Lips of an Angel
     

Edel, look at my shoes!

Edel,

I realised that these pair isn't the same as what you wanted! Don't know why it made me think of it though???????

But nevertheless, still pretty hot shoes!

HEeee :)

I was introduced to an older friend today. And just after some time of words exchanged, he said that I was afraid. Not of anything, but generally just afraid.

Did I somehow expose myself during the conversations, or did my fear just quietly leak out?

I had no clue.

But he was spot on correct.

I was afraid. I was afraid of risking it. I was afraid to lose everything I built so hard. I was afraid to let everyone see that I was shivering inside.

How did he ever know?

I put on my act so well everyday I was sure it was foolproof.
But I guess I was wrong.

Why big boobies arent that great

Breasts, boobs, jugs, titties, whatever you call them, everyone wants them.

Men AND women both want them (talking bout au naturel boobies).

Women who are not as well endowed as others want big boobies. And lets face it, men love big boobies, or rather, world class cleavages. Anything too big and its just excess.

But having big breasts isn't a complete blessing. It always has a string attached.

Yes we may get the job done easier. Yes men tend to sway toward us if we used them properly. Yes we may look sluttier than the average.

But so what?!?!?!?!?!!?

We have to pay more for bigger cup bras. D cup and above (sad to say), and we have to fork out more for bloody material, lace, lycra and clasps.

We are much more prone to back pain due to the large load at the front.

We can't wear low cut tops or dresses without looking too obvious and too provocative.

We can't run or jog as fast as flatter chest ladies.

We get more tired after running with the load as compared to the flatter chests.

We tend to sag terribly and earlier as compared to the flatter chests.

It's harder for us to sleep chest down.

Can't wear button down blouses without wearing a tube.

You may have to rest those big boobies on the table while paying attention to the teacher/boss.

We'll get more stretches when we're lactating.

You attract jealousy. women, tranvestites, etc.

You can't jump very high. The gravity works terribly on your titties.



So you know honeys, bad things come along with good things as well!

So be happy you have normal-asian sized boobies! (please don't kill me >_<)

I love Malaysia

Alot of people have asked me about my political views and comments.

I say I have nothing to say about it.

And they said that I was being smart to keep my comments to myself, lest being ambushed and killed unsuspecting in a freak accident.

ANYWAY.

Truth be told, .......*drum rolls*

I really have nothing to say about politics.

Becuase :

a) I'm really not interested in who is suggestedly bribing or getting bribed.

b) I'm really also not interested in the fights ensued between 2 (or more) selfish parties that obviously have no interest in the proper welfare of the country.

c) It's really boring seeing grown men fight over ports, sand, titles etc. If they were fighting in mud, that'll be more interesting. But still an iYawn.

d) It's dangerous voicing your views, what with the incognito ISA hanging around your ankles. I got too much shopping to live for.

e) You create unnecessary trouble for yourself ie, read the papers and see who's been going missing after what what.

f) I really am just not interested. A broken heel would have intrigued me more.

g) I really have nothing going on in my mind. My dad was right. I really am stupid! I have no comments for anything besides, shopping, food and sleep.


Many people have said that I am a disgrace to Malaysia, what having no political views about who is right or wrong.

Let me tell you. There is no right or wrong. There is only people's wants and needs for themselves. And they all do it for the sole purpose of basic survival (albeit it getting out of hand due to greed). Those who side the wrong party get eliminated and those who side the right party would also get eliminated. It is just too much of a risk to be siding anyone, or more so giving unnecessary opinions on what you think is correct. But GUESS WHAT? You're not the King, you're not the Sultan. You are a NOBODY. Your life and your opinions are like mosquitoes trying to brave the oncoming sand storm. You'll never win them.

But I am proud to be a Malaysian. That is all I can say. I am proud of my mother land, a land where I was born into. Beautiful, self sufficient, colourful and harmonious. I am proud that us Malaysians can get along with one another (extremists and other terrorists aside). Indians, Malays, Chinese, we don't care about the race. We need each other, we need to co-depend on each other to survive in this time we're living in.

We need to admit the fact that no one race can survive on their own in Malaysia. It's all about TEAMWORK. And there is no I (one race) in team work. There is no one superior race in Malaysia. Everyone needs everyone to survive. There are several hard facts which would be race sensitive that everyone knows, but yet we do not, and should not, look down on anyone.

Malaysia is like a tropical rainforest full of opportunities to grow and flourish. Without the plants, animals and insects, it would be nothing. It would just be a barren land, where everything eventually dies off. The government is like the entire ecosystem. It breaks down, we all die off eventually.

We shouldn't be politically swayed by what is on the cover of the newspapers. What is more important than daft arguments within the cabinet, is how the country is growing as one. If the government is fighting among each other, then who is looking out for the citizens, when it is they who should be looking after us?

Despite all the debacle that has been going on, I am proud to say that I still see the unity between our races in Malaysia going strong. We still have respect for one another and recognise the significance of each other role in Malaysia. Let this not become another Racial Riot that happened in the 50's. We have come too far now to sink back retrospectively.

This is as political as I can get. :D

How to make your man stay faithful.

Andrew, the Crunch time blogger, teaches you how to make your men happy and how they won't stray :



Just make sure you have your speakers wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy downnnnnnnnnnn lowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.

I know one should always do stuff and help without asking for any rewards or compensation. God knows I have done so much for everyone that I love.

But it doesn't hurt once in a while to have someone mutter thanks to you.

Especially from your own family.

Oh so the prodigal golden son does something right you all call for a celebration. Then you say hes the best kid cos he returns you money. Guess what? I don't owe you money (after I started working)!

WTF?

Do you all not want me at all? Do I have to suffer just because I'm a girl instead of a boy? Is it my obligation and duty just to serve my family without a word or act of gratitude? Whatever I do, there's always criticism attached to it. Why not enough egg? Why is the egg not as nice as yours? Why you never help me park the car in? WTF ? WTF DO I OWE YOU?

Why the fuck do I have to be a second mother to your sons? Why can't I be pampered? Why? What have I done wrong? WTF?

When they are irresponsible, you keep mum about it. When I buy another pair of shoes, with MY OWN MONEY, you fuck me up about it. KNOW YOUR FUCKING PRIORITIES, FOR FUCKS SAKE. You yourself know what I've done for the family compared to others. I know its not a competition and the things I do out of love for you all. But it feels I'm getting the short end of the stick.

Fuck I'm pissed off at the world. Every little decision, proclamation that my parents give hurts me to the core. They not only excluded my existence, they also wallpapered me when the golden child is around. Yes, I may not be as intelligent as him. Yes, I may not have the gift of the gab. And yes, I may have some weight problems. Doesn't mean you are allowed to make me feel like an unwanted child. I do not hate him, but I feel so overshadowed when he is around. It hurts me when my parents don't understand how much I love them.

I don't know. I'm just so upset.

sigh.

I realised that I get a kick out of watching weird stuff.

Well guess what? You LOOK LIKE CRAP!



Apparently it's hailed as a Goddess in India! Bless her.





Poor baby suffers from a rare disease called Harlequin Ichthyosis.

Worms inside your skin!

Fancy worms coming out your face?

Someone commented that "This is actually a treatment where they use the lipas tanah (earth roach), chop off the butt and squeeze the ooze on your face (usually its on ur nose) so that it heals certain illness for example the application on you nose is to cure sinus." - apparently the worms appear once the roaches guts are oxidised in air. and these speicific kind of roaches carry these kinda worms in them.

a trick played by conmen to get your money? Real healing freaking powers from a roach's gut?

Worms in your skin?

Rubbing roach ass on your face?

Hm????

Where am i going to start pointing which is grosser?

Damn, and it's in Malaysia!

Boss say I boh jeng hooooo. He not around I suka kui tiam lai dio kui tiam lai... paiseh lah bossss. mai ani kuan lahhhhhhhhh. lor jin eh sai chia mahhh!!!!!!! den hor, parking sibeh pai cher.

paiseh lahhhh. mai punch card lahh... laff you long time.............. kam siah your lovely huai ang!

love love x

Cosmopolitan for the Holy

Cosmopolitan for the holy girls.

No matter how

No matter how skinny I was back then and how much lard I've drank now, you still loved me for who I am. I was so much prettier back in high school, but some how along the way, I turned into an old ugly pumpkin, and you still loved me anyway.

No matter how messed up I am in my mind, you still managed to peal off the pieces one by one and helped me scrutinise my crazy and tell me that I'm ok for thinking the way I do, and that I'm not going insane.

No matter how badly the world criticised me for being imperfect, you were always there to tell me why despite of it, I'm still better than any of those who criticised me.

No matter how much I wanted to pull the plug and call it a day, you managed to convince me out of it and tell me why there is so much more things to live for and another 60 more years of happiness(?) to spend together.

No matter how much I ate, you still told me to eat more. I don't know if its fear of gastric, or that you're just fattening me so that no one else would want me.

No matter how much you had, you always gave me the best of it and had the bad ones for yourself.

No matter how screwed my thoughts were, your reasons always made sense and yours would be the only one I listened to.

No matter how crazy my DIY projects were, you were always there to support me and to lend a helping hand.

No matter how poor I was, you'd always put money in my purse so I would go completely poor.

No matter how my family hurt me, you always reminded me to forgive them.


No matter how imperfect you are to the world, you'll always be perfect to me <3

Gua Sha Treatment

I went for gua sha yesterday.

Here is what I gathered off the internet on information for gua sha.

Gua Sha is a healing technique used in traditional medicine. It involves palpation and cutaneous stimulation in which the skin is pressed with a piece of jade; that results in the appearance of small red patches. "Gua" means to scrape or rub. "Sha" is a reddish, elevated patch of skin. Sha is the term used to describe blood in the subcutaneous tissue before and after it is raised as a small red bump.

The Sha bump should fade in 2-4 days. If it is slower to fade, poor blood circulation is indicated and the practitioner must ascertain whether there is a deficiency of blood, Qi, Yang or a deeper organ deficiency at the root of the problem.

What are the benefits of Gua Sha? Gua Sha can be used to prevent and treat diseases and strengthen the body. Especially in the area of pain relief it is unequalled. It has a very quick effect on pain from head, neck, shoulder, joint and back pain to RSI, fibromyalgy, sciatica and other nerve pain, migraine, PMS, osteoporosis, rheumatism. It has as well an obvious effect on various diseases caused by functional disharmony of the internal organs.

In summarizing guasha is stimulating the immune system, detoxifies and de-acidifies, promotes the circulation, regulates functions and organs, removes blockades and pain, revitalizes and regenerates ("life-extension"), diminishes stress, fatigue and burn-out, improves e.g. cures (indirectly) countless (chronic) disorders and complaints, rebalances emotions, relaxes and promotes clarity of mind...everything through ONE simple treatment.

In the treatment a special oil is put on a particular area of the skin whereafter the therapist starts "scraping" the area with a "scraper" (an specially designed instrument of jade or horn). Very soon the skin becomes red. The amazing thing is, that on places where disorders are hidden, red spots appear IN the skin (not ON the skin) comparable to hemorrhage. Because the scraping is on the oily skin the patient will hardly feel pain - neither during nor after the treatment - the skin will not be damaged, and the red spots will fully disappear within 3 to 7 days.




Do you know the english call it spooning? HAHAHAHAHA. I know something else that they refer to as spooning too! :P

Ok, you get the gist after reading the epilogue of my post.

ANYWAYS, I suspected that my body would turn blue black due to the high amount of toxins in it. But to my surprise it wasn't that bad, it was only light red, with a few patches of red spots.

After doing your gua sha, it'll turn out something like this :

pics credit to google

the lady used something like this to scrap me : A, B and C. D and E looks too freaky.

Anyways right, she started off by furiuosly scraping the top of my head (to which I nearly passed out due to the pain). I swore at least 2000 strands fell off from the way she was scraping, but she said, no worries, you wont go bald. this is to stimulate your blood flow to the roots of your air! oh okayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy. then she started scraping near my temples. I nearly passed out from that as well due to the excruciating pain. Then she went on to the bottom and the back of my head. It felt amazing after that. I felt light headed. Probably from stimulated blood flow, or more likely, the pain that numbed my senses. I instantly felt lighter after that. And she said. Your stress and pressure has reached its peak limit. You have to relax or you'll burst very soon. (HAH, she IS right. Now for that I give her credit).

Then she started scraping my whole body, and she came to this conclusion :

- alot of wind in my body.

- bad stomach (gastric)

- weak heart

- weak uterus (hah, tell me something I don't already know)

- water retention

- sinus

-bla bla bla, bla bla bla.

So apparently I have ALLLLLLLLLLLLLl the problems on earth! Who could have guessed?

And oh, she also said, no running or jogging, or the uterus will drop from its position, which I highly believe that!

BUT I did fart and burp alot while scraping, showing that the wind IS leaving my body, which is an extremely good sign! Well happy (and embarrassed at the same time) about that!

You all should go try it once, it will tell you how your body condition is!

Things I'm afraid of

Things I'm afraid of :

1) Clowns

Have you watched IT? If you have, you will freaking understand my fear! FREAKING CLOWNS! With razor teeth! Yikes!

2) Cockroaches

The flying ones are the worst!!!!


3) 2 girls 1 cup

I don't know why people would enjoy watching this horrifying thing! It's gross!!!!


4) deafening silence

A medium where time and space stands still............


5) public toilets

How can you not be terrified of a place that people pee all over ?!

6) balloons

Refer to No.1


7) your father

cos you know, he's not MY father!


8) blood/accidents

I have a weak heart. If I see someone crash their bike eventhough they are ok, I still throw up. Blood just makes me hurl even easier.


9) heights

I used to think I was cool with heights. But boy, was I wrong after climbing angkorwat!


10) alot of work

Yes, yes, don't tell me you aren't!


11) weird men who follow me

I'm terrified of being followed. When I was living in manchester for a bit, there was a weird guy who trailed me all the way from where I was living to town. Fuck me, I had to run to the nearest police post to make sure he wouldnt follow me. And the worst part, my ex thought I was making all of it up.

hey, if you're cute, its completely fine with me. If you are shaggy looking with dirty clothes and that crazy look in your eye, I'll start running.


12) dying alone

Do YOU wanna die alone? with 9 cats and only being discovered a week later with half your face eaten off? And ONLY being discovered cos there was a smell that was disturbing the neighbours.


13) commitment

despite wanting to get married eventually, my breath skips at the thought of it. I can't even commit to a shampoo!


14) complicated techy stuff

Yes, I'm a tech idiot. Live with it. I can't even function a modem.


15) math & physics

Failed and failed. Need I say more? That's why I took law!


16) really really bad drivers

They literally are the cause of my high blood pressure.

Have I told you I'm afraid of clowns?

After watching IT, it really scared the shit out of me.

Fuck, balloons freak me out as well.

And the whole circus clown theme music or something.

My goodness. I need to watch IT again to relive all my nightmares. And also poltergeist. And also shutter.

Sigh.

Aw kitteh

I need to make some jello shots and stock them in the fridge soon.

God knows how badly I need them.

Sometimes I wish I had longer and slender fingers!

Mines now short and stubby, and my nails don't even grow nice!

As if I have nothing else to whine about, everything about me is wrong!

Damnit. Why!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hah.

On a lighter (and more depressing) note, having baby Rosabelle in our lifes just made my uterus self destruct. I don't think I will ever want a baby (like her), who is really half devil, or should I say, pure evil.

Mind you, she's a lovely baby - when her mouth isn't open. I don't know why. Are we such hateable creatures? Perhaps! But her world should revolve around ours, not us around hers! Rosabelle, if you think your lovely aunt is going to give in to your whims and fancies, you really picked the wrong aunt!

Just taking care of her for a day has put the thought of settling down and finally having a kid (lets say, in 3-4 years) away. I will most definitely, kill my own child should she be this way. And I won't even feel guilty. That's how bad it is. I love her to bits when shes not crying and being a mini-bitch.

I'm a baby hater arnt' I? I will probably change my mind about this post once I stop baby sitting her and catching her at her best times (laughing and drooling). I am a much more patient person to my family recently, but this, this really raises the bar on patience. You have no idea what patience entails. It would be carrying the baby for about 4 hrs, crying all the way (both of us, me on the inside), and finally falling asleep in between from exhaustion due to all the crying, then waking up crying again because her mummy wasn't there. In between there's lots of coaxing, swinging around and walking around the house compound). She knows that once she cries, her mummy will rush to her side to coo her. But guess what? Your mummy went out today (as it is natural that your mum was finally able to see the real world after 4 months), so no one can save you, till about 12midnight when she finally comes home. By that time you'll be asleep, so there would be peace on earth (as you're sleeping now).

Perhaps next time I should slide some Jack or Black into your water bottle. That ought to chill you, you super cry baby.


On another note, my two little girls (dogs) are finally bleeding all over the house (on heat lah!). Welcome to womanhood. You're gonna love a live of being a virgin because no one will let you out of the house to screw other dogs. Have fun!

Is it me, or do I think everyone's bf (sometimes mine as well) are total assholes and that my darling girlfriends deserve so much better than what they have?

I SHOULD start minding my own business.

There is literally a little kitty sitting on my table as I write now.

The Contractors finaly got around to catching the "phantom cats" on my ceiling, and they only got this little baby.

Might have to throw it away at the end of the day because, you know, can't bring cats home.

oh well!!! :D

Yes you're right, men know NOTHING about women.

How to gift wrap a cat!

See more funny videos and Cute Animals Videos at Today's Big Thing.

Because everyone has a cat to give away!!!!!

I just found out that the main cause of my abdominal discomfort is via stress. Of course my mum pissed me off big time again time morning. I was slightly better after the good sleep and tons of belly rubs, but it worsened after a series of horrendous nagging bl bla bla blab albalblabla

So. I have to be high on prozac to be happy right? Or a bottle of anti-depressants swirled with vodka.

ANYWAY.

This is fun.

And it totally freaked me out.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. this cracked me up big time! XD

Stomach cancer?

I've been having gas in my tummy all week. its been bloated (my upper abdominal), i burp gas and feel general discomfort all over.

It's either a bad case of wind, or stomach cancer (as I've googled it - most of the symptoms are there, except the mysterious weight loss,which is no where to be sighted).

Aiyaiyaiyaiyai.

This is not good.

Bunny says its all the stress thats causing ie failures, hysteria, mental breakdowns, all within a span of a week.

I hope he's right.

I haven been sleeping or eating well for almost a week now.

Sigh.

What I want at my Funeral

I was just thinking last night, if I my time on earth is through (by God's will or suicide), this is what I want at my funeral :

a) F.r.i.e.n.d.s re-run playing at the background. Everyone needs some laughs. My funeral would mean many relieves for many many people!

b) Have a bubble blower constantly blowing bubbles !

c) People will be served fried chicken and flenflies (not those chinese cooks with their big woks and all smokey and such)

d) No big chinese musical orchestra to send me off. I'd like a 4 string quartet please. Playing all my favourite love songs thank you very much.

e) Have my death portrait as my most fabulous self - the (ex-)clubbing diva.

f) No joss sticks or what not - Just cigarratte sticks and bottles of malibu.

g) No plastic chairs - I would like to at least have my funeral ceremony with taste.

h) Have tea roses as centrepieces on the tables.

i) Everyone will be required to wear green and gold at the funeral.

j) Serve them lotsa jelly as dessert!

k) My tombstone would read "Buried Alive"

l) The taxidermist or undertaker would have to dress me in a black classy peplum dress and someone's got to give me amazing smokey eyes which does not make me look like the characters in the Nightmare before Christmas.


People are going to have to remember me as the girl who laughed alot.

And to pay for my extravagant funeral, I'd use the money from selling all my shoes, bags and accessories to fund it.

It's gonna be great!

Cheap Frills And Thrills

My new logo for my really cheap cheap blogshop!

Pretty right? :)

561 posts!

561 Posts!!!

FUCK ME!

I must be spam-blogging! WTFFF!!! Doesn't even feel that much!

GOODNESSS!!!!!!!

Will buy myself a pair of shoes when I hit 1,000.

woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooot.

Mother and Daughter Relationships

Most mothers and daughters have this special bond that ovverrides any other relationships that ever exists.

It consists of mainly "I can't live without you, but I CAN'T live WITH YOU."

There are three subsets of different kinds of mothers.

Mother No.1

The ever so caring, ever understanding, "YES" mother that wants you to be happy and will support your every step along the way without ever doubting or questioning your intelligence on being able to handle stuff on your own.

They will never force their views on you, merely giving motherly advise and in hope that you'll take heed.

However, these subset of mothers strongly believe that their daughters/children should take their own leap of faith and see what turns out.

Mothers like these rarely have any strains with their daughters and they are hardly ever at each other necks.

Mother No.2

Extremely loving mother who has a streak of crazy over-protectiveness, most probably because she just loves her children TOO MUCH and they are the centre of their world. These mothers would give ANYTHING to their children in hope that these children become her minions and do her every bidding.

These mothers are controlling and always think they are right and want the best for their daughters. Nothing the daughters do will ever be right, and these mothers never seem to be contented with their children. These mothers want the best for their children and would never take no for an answer. They will never stop even if an earthquake hits them. They have to give an opinion on everything, never seem to stop talking and making sure people accepts their decisions.

Mothers like these have a partial loving yet strained relationships with their daughters. They are always at each others' necks but gets back together sooner or later because they can't deny their love for each other.

Mother No.3

These subset of mothers are those who don't give a shit about their daughters. They are either too into their own self (ie botox, gambling, drinking, toyboys) or that they pay too much attention to their sons, because they're traditional like that.

These mothers often think that their daughters are a liability and would pray that their daughters get married quickly.

They don't pay attention to them, even when the daughters ask for it. They often show a cold shoulder towards them. Most likely because ...... there are no reasons why mothers can ever show a cold shoulder to their own offsprings. But there are people like that.

Relationships between these mother and daughters are - non existent. Mother ignores daughter, daughter ignores mother (but hides feeling inside to want affection from them), life moves on, daughter has another daughter and hopefully treats her differently from how her mother treated her.


Of course with different kinds of mothers there will be also different kinds of daughters lah.

Daughter No.1

Mummy's little girl. Everything she'll listen to mummy. She'll listen to what mummy says, what she should wear where she should go what she should do who she should date who she should marry bla bla bla. You get the idea. They look like a carbon copy of each other.

Mothers absolutely love these kind of daughters. Very suitable for controlling mothers.

Daughter No. 2

Love their mothers to bits, but has reservation of their own thoughts. They don't want to hurt their mother with their thinking but wants to stand firm on their decisions. They are very considerate of their mothers' feelings however they don't want to suffer their whole lives with a decision made by someone else. Would do absolutely anything for their mothers however will always take time to make sure that their own interests are protected.

Controlling mothers have a love-hate relationship with these kind of daughters.

Daughter No.3

Daughters like these are indifferent to what their mothers say. They are in their own world, only listens to their own decisions, doesn't give a shit about what anyone says.

Very hardheaded, very stubborn, very blunt. They walk in and out of the house without recognition of their mothers.

Most likely hurt badly when young by mother or any other influential figure, hence developing this hard armour to protect her self interests further. Mothers' like these have a tough time cracking these kind of nut.



Apologies for being brief, but I was only touching on the end of the sticks and the middle. There are much room for the grey area of mother daughter relationships which would take an extreme amount of time to venture into.

Basically, mum is no.2 and I'm also no.2.

We have a terrible love hate relationship. I don't know what she feels like doing to me, but most of the time, I feel like putting a pillow over head and suffocating her to death, or sewing up her mouth, or praying to God that she loses her voice - forever. But you know, these rarely comes true. She really knows how to push my buttons and I know how to push hers as well. Most days we're really good. But on the bad days, we're worse. We're like cats and dogs. We hate each other to the core, but we eventually we love each other back. It's a really complicated relationship we have. I suppose its the immense love that we have for each other that makes us so different but we don't want to see each other fall. But it works out in the end (because I tend to step back to prevent her getting heart attack or stroke). I will KIV till when these arrangement works out for the both of us.

Sigh. The things I do not to kill my mum! >_<

BeeBay Bloom - Diaper Cakes!

Recently my cousin set up this blog shop which I find very intriguing and unique. As far as I can see, her idea is original and perhaps if I dare to say, the first of its kind in Malaysia!

So everyone is always giving birth and we're all always attending their full moon parties, or giving babies gifts when they are just born.

We know what the parents need more than money as gifts, are diapers, or infant formula.

Clothes are an ok gift, but not so feasible as babies grow at such a fast speed that they outwear their clothes in NO TIME!

So my cousin of course thought of the most logical gift to give to the parents of the babies - DIAPERS.

In these modern times, babies need to be wearing pampers, unless if you're a stay at home mum who LOVES washing soiled diapers. Diapers are convenient, essential and PRACTICAL!!!!!!!!

Of course just buying Mamypoko or Pampers is UGLY and PLAIN as a freaking gift, She is the first to come up with DIAPER CAKES! CHECK it out!!!! :)

See so cute? Not only you can use the diapers, it is also pleasing to the eyes and is very aesthetic in nature! It does not have to be cows, she can custom make it to your heart's desires. (the baby's were born in the year of cows, hence she gave them cow plushies as centrepiece!)

The price range varies on brand of diapers, toys and ribbons. Customers are to pay for their own courier charges and it can be sent all over Malaysia!!!!!!!!!

Read this about BeeBay Bloom!

Love Things Sweet, Love Things Beautiful, Love to personally make it for you.
If you looking for a perfect gift for New Born Baby. This would be the most Sweetest Gift You could ever give.

Started in a Humble Home of Penang Island, creating perfect gifts for New Born or Baby Gifts called Diaper Cake.
It is custom made to order, where all creation will be unique and sweet. It is practical and useful gift which every New Mother would love to receive.

If you need us to deliver to the person directly with a Message from you can be arrange for Penang Island only.

Rest assured these diaper cakes are one of its kind! Unique, Original, Pretty, Cute and Practical!

If you didn't buy it from BeeBay Bloom, You didn't buy it right!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

CLICK HERE TO VISIT
BEEBAY BLOOM!

hot hot hot

WHYYYYYY!?!?!?

WHY SO UNFAIR!?

Why is England covered in SNOW while I'm burning my extra lard off in this blistering heat?!

Why do we have to live right on the equator!?

Why does Malaysia not have 4 seasons?! (Don't reply that, its rhetorical).

Why does Malaysia have such a shitty weather? (again, rhetorical)

Why is Malaysia's crime rate so high?

Why are the rich getting richer, while the poor, remaining poor as hell????

Why is Malaysia's public transport shitty?

Where has all our tax money gone?! (rhetorical!)

Why is Malaysia so HOTTTTT?

Argh.

hot hot h

Post it pussy

My friend, K.Loh inspired me to do this to all the bad drivers out there.

of course you can spot his child like writing.

it's endearing ok!!!!



note to self : Always have postit and pen in bag or in car glove compartment.

It's easier than sticking a big piece of paper with elephant glue.

heeeeeeee.

TGI Fridays

Due to my ultimate depression yesterday which I will not divulge because it is so embarrassing that even an ostrich will bury itself together with its legs in the sand, bunny brought me for Fridays.

Tears were just streaming down my face and I think bunny's heart broke watching me cry.

So bunny decided the ultimate. Treat me to Fridays and eat whatever I want.

At first I protested, because

a) it was fricking expensive. Money damn hard to earn ok? Don have to blow it off on some super tender juicy piece of steak.

b) i wanted to curl in my room and die. and/or

c) suffocate in the humid air of my bathroom while hot showering, in hopes that I'd knock my head on the toiletbowl and die.

But none of the above came true.

So bunny dragged me all the way to Fridays. I wanted to order the cheapest set. But bunny insisted that I ordered the most expensive piece of juicy jack daniels medium rare, with shrimp and mash.

My God. That truly is a piece of haven in every bite. It totally is like an orgasm on my tongue. Cheered me up, but at the back of my head, I'm still a big fat fucking failure. Sigh.

I am glad there was bunny to be there to comfort me in my times of sorrow.

I hate my life. But i don't hate bunny.

Bunny is one of the rare few reasons why the days are slightly easier to get by.


Thank you bunny.

meow meow. xxxxxxxx

I think Yoda will be drumming this inside my head all night long till my brains bursts out of my eye sockets.

Gonzo and 69

Yes Gonzo, I believe you, I really do!

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA

I miss the cold in England.

I heard that snow has been coming down hard the past week or so. They didn't even snow till spring when I was there! you can imagine my fume that I am stuck at home because there was a snowstorm going on and I might just be buried under 200ft of snow.

Fcuk me, Malaysia has the worst weather on earth. Fuck.

Argh.

Our little Belle knows how smile like an idiot now. She also knows how to flip over and follow sounds.

She is now also a big fan of the windscreen wipers.

Bless her tiny soul.

X

How to punish your BF the unconventional way

Fran was speaking to me this morning about punishing her bf 'hoho' - as we endearingly call him, cos he slapped her. But to his defense she slapped him first, so no body is rushing to the phones calling women's aid to ask them to come lock him up cos he's a wife beater.

But HOW do we punish him when our bf's tick us off? That is the ultimate question.

We aren't looking for conventional ways like... killing him, refusing sex, stop picking up his calls. BLA BLA BLA. These are all outdated oK! We must be modern like the times we're living in now!

Ok, i've brainstormed for 2 mins.

And here's how :

1) Make flyers and paste it everywhere.

Put his big face on an A4 paper and write this way - _____, giant dickhead/douchebag/asswipe/a-hole/knnbccb.

Then photo shop and dick, and paste it on his forehead. Then click print!

Staple and paste this on to anything you can get. If you're generous, spend some money to get kids to give your flyers out! :D

2) Shove a tomato or potato into his car exhaust.

You get the idea.

3) Lure him into bed.

And hand cuff him to the bed post, and leave him there for 30 hrs. That'll teach him a lesson to mess around with you.

4) Tell his mother that you're pregnant.

and then he pushed you down the stairs, so now you've just had a miscarriage. Tell her he did that because he didn't love you anymore and wanted to get rid of you.

Let's see how aunty kicks his ass.

5) Remove the batteries from the tv remote,

and glue it onto the ceiling fan blade. He tugs too hard, the whole fan comes down. If he's bright enough, he'll dismantle the blades and take it down.

OR

you can glue the tv on off buttons together so they don't move when pushed.

6) Porn stash.

Know where he keeps his FHM? ZOO? Playboy? Well glue all their sides together. Let's see how he tries to pry them open.

7) Glue all his cards together.

Driving license, atm card, creditcard, autopass, ANYTHING that he needs to use daily, glue them together. with ELEPHANT GLUE.

8) Glue his dick and balls together.

YEs i'm all about the gluing. It's cheap and effective ma! It's too bloody to cut them all off and you might go to jail big time for that.

If you're still angry after this, glue his lips together.

9) Cut off all the electrical appliances.

First cut off the tv, then the phone, the the computer and all the other mee-hoon wire cords, then the fridge (hohohohohohoho), then finally the main box switch (if thats possible).

10) Pour glue on his couch.

And on his stairs, and banisters. Toilet seats. Anything possible.

May be alot of work. but it's fun to watch the aftermath.

11) Soak his cpu in water.

Then put it back where it was and watch the fun again.

12) Buy lotsa crickets from the petshop

And set them free in his house! Pay back, and good karma for releasing life! :D It's also cheap!



Ok lah, thats all I got from 2 mins of brainstorming!

Have fun with your revenge!

New bedroom layout

Yes, so I've finally and painstakingly painted my room.

Fuck me, there were so much rubbish that I never knew that I had/needed/horded/hidden everywhere in my room. Moving it out was a mega bitch and I've never been more tired than this.

Painting wasn't that bad actually except painting the corners which I had to use a ladder to go up up up, or I had to bend down down down. Niaseng cibai, my bones now bendy, made of liquorice.

Anyway, I chose apple cut green, nabeh, my walls were yellow, so green and yellow = wad? BLUE LORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. NBCCB. so now my walls are light blue, which I am pleasantly surprised, cos it looks like pastel turqouise!!!!!!!!!!!!! My part efforts are not wasted afterall. It's quite fun painting lah.

I got carried away - I started painting my door frames,because they all kena paint, and I'm damn lazy to wipe them away!

So a 5litre can of paint couldnt be finished, I should have finished my other grills, but I really can't be arsed. I was damn tired.

I rearranged the couch and the table to get a new 'fengshui'. Of course, no one qualified has been to my room to tell me that my bed and toilet was facing the wrong way, or that my wall colours were of badluck, but i don't fucking care! as long as I'm happy waking up to my room, it's always good fengshui!

My dressing table remains as this, but is now converted to my laptop table :

I moved my couch to where my old table was, so it made a little cozy nook in the room where I can lie down or sit comfortably and go online and watch shows. The subwoofer is placed in the little corner so the sound system is amazing - I use logitech thanks to ah soon, but many may beg to differ that altec lansing is the best! But i don't give a shit ok! I bought it online for nabeh 25poounds and I'm gonna make sure i fully use it!

You can see in the pic, below the giraffe prints, theres a blanket. Thats cos i'm sitting under the aircon and I can use the blanket to snuggle when im chilly! How amazing is that! And if you're wonderng bout the painting I'm painting animal prints to put on my wall. So far I have cow, tiger, zebra, cheetah and giraffe. im tired of painting alrady ok!

I also got the floating wall brackets put in.

Felt abit sad that holes were being drilled into my old walls, but I need more space for more useless stuff ok!!!!!!

Good thing the brackets were placed high enough that I wouldnt bump my head when I wake up. Other people I'm not so sure. This is specifically designed for short people like me! KEKEKEKEKEEKEK

See, I put the table on the other wall, so I have loads of walking space. An another floating wall bracket for my other shits! Man I have too many stuffs for my own good!

Plus yesterday I bought goose feather down pillow and 280 thread count cotton JeanPerry pillow cases because I'm a grown up alreadY! (Actually my current pillows are of the same level as the bed).

Ok lor, tired already lah, no more new stuff for the whole year! I'm all set!

XXXXXXXXX

ps: sorry my bed damn messy lah. Cannot be arsed making it for the photos, because I'm not pretentious like that! :P

pps: poor ah beng. sayang you k. you have been overworked. XXXXX mucho thankies! x